i’m totally with you on keeping it simple and warm. anything beyond that can feel invasive or extractive on a bad day. i had a grief group recommend us to ask each other “how are you doing today” to limit the intensity of the scope and practice day by day, so i try to bring that in too
I am so sorry to read that Tashi passed away. The grief must be overwhelming. My sister in Vancouver just lost her 29-year old son to an accidental overdose. Witnessing her grief has been humbling. Looks like you are taking care of yourself as best as you can. Hugs.
Thank-you Dianne. Writing these posts has been a very helpful way to try figure things out, process the daily encounters with the world, and come to an understanding of my own reactions. ☀️👍
I get hungry reading your posts! The steak sounds so good, I may give it a try soon with some Wagyu I have stacked away.
Your point on condolences is appropriate. It is awkward on both sides, especially when we are caught by surprise. But agreed, simple words that matter and a hug is most important.
In the months and years after my husband's son died, he had different answers for different people who didn't know about the death and asked how Ben was doing. One answer was for acquaintances, which was along the lines of "he's moved away." Now, when new friends ask if he has children, he sometimes says No, and sometimes says I had a son but he died. What we've learned over time is that there is no one right answer that fits all situations. Time and place and who's asking and what you feel like getting into at a particular moment all come into play.
i’m totally with you on keeping it simple and warm. anything beyond that can feel invasive or extractive on a bad day. i had a grief group recommend us to ask each other “how are you doing today” to limit the intensity of the scope and practice day by day, so i try to bring that in too
Thanks Sarah. The simple check-in is a good default.
Thank Naomi for your raw honesty on the journey of grevience. And for reminder that a simple check in can be sufficient.
Always love hearing about the meals prepared and your gatherings. Sharing meals is so beautiful.
I am so sorry to read that Tashi passed away. The grief must be overwhelming. My sister in Vancouver just lost her 29-year old son to an accidental overdose. Witnessing her grief has been humbling. Looks like you are taking care of yourself as best as you can. Hugs.
Thank-you Dianne. Writing these posts has been a very helpful way to try figure things out, process the daily encounters with the world, and come to an understanding of my own reactions. ☀️👍
I get hungry reading your posts! The steak sounds so good, I may give it a try soon with some Wagyu I have stacked away.
Your point on condolences is appropriate. It is awkward on both sides, especially when we are caught by surprise. But agreed, simple words that matter and a hug is most important.
Take care
Thanks Zafar...let me know about the steak...
A perfect re-entry Nom. I can taste all of those familiar flavors.
Thanks Deb!
In the months and years after my husband's son died, he had different answers for different people who didn't know about the death and asked how Ben was doing. One answer was for acquaintances, which was along the lines of "he's moved away." Now, when new friends ask if he has children, he sometimes says No, and sometimes says I had a son but he died. What we've learned over time is that there is no one right answer that fits all situations. Time and place and who's asking and what you feel like getting into at a particular moment all come into play.
Lush
Thanks Ken…
Thanks so much Pam. Yes, "he moved away" feels like a solid answer.. in such a vulnerable unsolid situation. Warm thoughts to you both. ☀️🧡
Thanks!